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Caelin Niehoff is a sophomore at DePaul University pursuing a degree in American Studies. Caelin is an Interfaith Scholar and is involved with Catholic Campus Ministry at DePaul.
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Tranquility and the warmth of the sun’s reflection off the lake permeated George Williams College grounds: Lake Geneva Wisconsin. DePaul students departed University Ministry vans and buses alike, beginning their reflective, weekend retreat. As VCSO (Vincentian Community Service Organization) leaders, students sought the self and communal reflection of the weekend’s themes: community, diversity and non-violence, while working towards peace.
As a participant at the retreat, I had several expectations for the weekend: rest and energized spirits. While an expectation of rest in the midst of a rejuvenated motivation may appear a paradox or an unrealistic expectation, it manifested itself in much of the weekend’s activities. One of my favorite aspects of the weekend was time to myself. College life can be, how should we say, life consuming, all encompassing and engulfing body, mind and soul.
The beauty of attending a university in Chicago, in my opinion, is the constant reminder that we are a part of something bigger. Nevertheless, it is still all too easy to be swept away by anxieties and demands of college life. The sheer quietness that accompanied Lake Geneva was settling. I spent moments to myself laying on a dock, hovering above the water’s waves; suspended above the current, yet feeling connected, grounded even, to the earth and that particular moment in time.
I was challenged. I was challenged to stop, and to think. The theme of the reflection was violence. What forms of violence do we encounter in our daily lives? One form of violence that I was called to meditate on was violence of the self: violence and harm in its most internal form. How can we love others if we do not first love ourselves? How can I think harmful thoughts and act peacefully towards others? This challenge was carried and supported by the community I shared that weekend. I knew that I was not alone and that with the support of others and the opportunity to meditate, even internal violence can be mended with peace.
One form of this healing process, for me, is prayer. The interfaith scholars, during a group prayer, called the VCSO community to think about prayer. Why do we pray? How do we pray? Where and when do we pray? How are individuals connected through prayer? For me, prayer is a giving of thanks. To me, prayer is an action that reminds me and binds me to the earth when the earth persists to spin. At the same time, I see prayer as a dialogue, as a walk, an exploration and further understanding of myself as a child of God.
Here we are brought back to my original juxtaposition: contemplation in the midst of motion. Settling your feet, while moving forward. Reflect and progress. Reflection may find absence in our lives but it is the process, yes, the development of thought that allows us to keep calm, and most importantly, carry on.
“Therefore do not be anxious for tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”- Matthew 6:34