Year: 2020

How Do I Know Someone is Experiencing Anxiety or Depression?

kwagne26 Health and Well-being ,

How Do I Know Someone is Experiencing Anxiety or Depression?

Article posted by Mental Health First Aid By Rubina Kapil on March 20, 2020

 

If you or someone you care about feels overwhelmed with emotions like sadness, depression or anxiety, or like you want to harm yourself or others call 911.

You can also contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) Disaster Distress Helpline at 800-985-5990, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or text MHFA to 741741 to talk to a Crisis Text Line counselor.

 

We know that these days of COVID-19 are difficult and can bring feelings of anxiety or depression. Practicing physical distancing from your loved ones, hearing constantly changing news on every channel, and not knowing what will happen is scary.

That’s why it is important that you use information from the Mental Health First Aid curriculum to not only take care of your own mental health, but also support those around you who might be experiencing anxiety or depression. When people describe their anxiety, they may use terms such as anxious, stressed, freaking out, panicky, wound up, nervous, on edge, worried, tense, overwhelmed or hassled.

Anxiety can vary in severity from mild uneasiness to a terrifying panic attack. Anxiety can also vary in how long it lasts — from a few moments to many years.

Although everyday anxiety is an unpleasant state, it can be quite useful in helping a person avoid dangerous situations and motivating them to solve everyday problems. An anxiety disorder differs from everyday anxiety in the following ways:

  1. It is more severe.
  2. It is persistent.
  3. It interferes with the person’s activities, studies, and family and social relationships.
  4. If not treated, it continues to cause real pain and distress, and it can lead to poor academic performance, impaired social functioning and other negative outcomes.

Depression causes feelings of sadness and/or a loss of interest in activities once enjoyed. It can lead to a variety of physical and emotional problems, such as irritability. A person’s pain may be invisible to you while it is still interfering with functioning.

If you or someone you know is experiencing intense worry or sadness about current or future events, and it is disrupting their ability to cope with everyday life, there is support available.

There are self-help strategies and treatments that can be effective with anxiety or depression. There are also behavioral health care providers who can provide services by phone and/or secure videoconferencing, so they will be able to maintain physical distancing. If you don’t know where to start, reach out to your primary care physician.

Thank you for choosing to #BeTheDifference with Mental Health First Aid. Together, we can get through this difficult time and support our loved ones along the way.

Wellness Wednesday- Mental Illness and Recovery

Natalie Altenburg Links

Last week, we talked about mental health and why it is important.  This week we are expanding more on mental health by talking about the prevalence of mental health disorders, the stigma that surrounds these disorders, and what we can all do to support the mental health needs of ourselves and others! 

Let’s begin by looking at a few numbers.  The National Institute of Mental Health has found that nearly 1 in 5 American adults live with a mental illness.  However, 7.7 billion adults have both mental health disorders and substance use disorders, which is known as Co-Occurring Disorders (National Institute on Drug Abuse).  Shockingly enough, the National Institute on Drug Abuse found that only 9.1% of those with co-occurring disorders have received treatment for both disorders and 52.5% have not received any treatment at all.                                                                                                                

        

 

While mental illness is not uncommon, there is still stigma surrounding these disorders.  There are many factors that contribute to mental health stigma.  Let’s examine a few: 

Language: Simply put, the language we use has an impact.  The words we say and the way we use these words reflect our ideals and beliefs.  Therefore, if we use stigmatizing language (such as the words “crazy” or “psycho”) as insults, it generally implies that those that struggle with mental health are not good people, when that is clearly not the case.   

Lack of awareness and education: Not only does lack of education make it hard to recognize when one might need help, but it also helps contribute to the misconceptions that surround those with mental illness and substance use disorders. 

The idea of “normal”: With the lack of accurate representation of mental health and substance use disorders in the media, it can create the illusion that it is not normal to struggle with mental health.  However, the statistics that have been presented previously in this post show that struggling with mental health is not uncommon.   

With all these factors that keep the stigma going, there is one thing we can all do to help erase this stigma- be active bystanders.  Being an active bystander can look like many different things.  It could look like politely correcting a friend after they used stigmatizing language.  Or it could look like educating yourself by listening to what those that have mental health struggles have to say and believe it.  Or it could simply be not judging someone who you suspect is struggling with substance use.  Different people have different levels of comfortability and different ways of interacting with others, so it is okay to do whatever it is you need to do to be an active bystander.  The best thing you can do is something.  

Before we provide you with some resources, let’s take a moment to see what DePaul community members in recovery have to say about mental health, substance use, and recovery: 

 

As you can see, recovery and mental health take a bit of effort, but this effort is worth it.  It can be especially helpful to know that you are not alone in dealing with mental health struggles.  If you are looking for more support, here are some great places to get you started: 

DePaul Resources: 

  • Office of Health Promotion and Wellness 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/hpw.aspx 

  • Collegiate Recovery Community 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/support-services/health-wellness/Pages/substance-abuse-recovery.aspx 

  • University Counseling Services 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/ucs.aspx 

  • Center for Students with Disabilities 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/csd.aspx 

  • Dean of Students 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/dos.aspx 

  • Office of Multicultural Student Success 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/omss.aspx 

  • Adult, Veteran, and Commuter Student Affairs 

https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/adult-veteran-commuter-student-services.aspx  

Other Resources: 

  • Hope For The Day  

https://www.hftd.org/ 

  • Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration  

https://www.samhsa.gov/  

  • National Alliance on Mental Illness 

https://www.nami.org/Home  

  • National Institute of Mental Health 

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/index.shtml 

  • National Institute on Drug Abuse 

https://www.drugabuse.gov/  

In case you missed it, here is the link to our Wellness Wednesday discussion: https://depaul.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=a46778f5-9335-4c32-a6e9-abc3010ea3a9

Take care!

Social Media Cleanse During COVID-19

lwalinsk PHE Blogs , , ,

Hello everybody! Let’s talk COVID-19 x Social Media. Here I will be discussing social media usage during COVID-19 and what I noticed when I cut down on my social media usage for a few days. As COVID-19 continues, it has become obvious that a lot of us are spending more time on our phones and laptops (even TVs) than we used to before. Some of us are perfectly fine with this, and it is working well as a means of keeping in touch and up to date, and others are frustrated with how much time is currently spent on the screen. I fall into the latter category. Because some of my screen time (like work and school initiatives) is non-variable, I decided to change the one aspect of it that is variable for me: my usage for personal purposes, a lot of which involves social media. Keep reading for my personal tips around why cutting down on usage can be helpful as well as how you might go about approaching this!

(Keep in mind, this is not for everybody right now – many of us are far away from loved ones and find social media to be a great tool in helping keep us connected. Many of us tend to use social media as a news source. And for some of us, social media usage and technology usage is simply a means of coping right now – and that is perfectly okay if it’s working for you. If this is the case for you, maybe sometime in the future would be more feasible for a cleanse like this. Or maybe you do a half cleanse now… still use certain platforms but not others, or just use platforms less than you usually would. OR maybe now is the perfect time for a cleanse because you’re sick of all of the screen time. Do what is best for you personally! The following are some ideas that worked for me.)

If you are currently a student like me, not only are you now taking four (or more) online classes, you might also be doing remote work for a job as well. For me, the combination of four different online classes, a remote job in which I engage in 5/7 days of the week, the online search for a job for after graduation, and any personal technology usage outside of these things really adds up! It feels as though my whole life could be lived on the screen right now if I let it get to that place. Which is why I wanted to write this post… and why I took a cleanse from social media for a few days.

 

 

 

 

 

For my cleanse, I decided to remove Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, and TikTok (we all know how encaptivating this one is nowadays) from my phone. For me, it had to be all of these apps, as I wanted to do a full cleanse, and these are the social media apps that I gravitate towards the most on a daily (sometimes even hourly – oops) basis. Initially, I kept the apps fully deleted, but one day in I decided to redownload them, simply turn off all notifications and badges for each of them, and keep them in a folder on the last ‘page’ of my phone where I wouldn’t be as tempted to click on them. The only reason I redownloaded the apps was so that I could check in once or twice a day to stay connected, but still remain mostly off of these apps. I made this decision because I realized that right now – during COVID – it is extremely hard to be completely disconnected from social media as a lot of our interaction with loved ones occurs over social media at this moment in time. Basically, I noticed that I did not want to be completely disconnected from this outlet, as there are many positive aspects to it as well, so I adjusted my cleanse. A big tip of mine: Feel free to adjust at any time if you need to! This is all about what serves YOU best.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Being flexible in this way is important, in my mind, as it leaves more room for ‘process improvement,’ so to speak. I am also a big proponent of the idea of balance in life, so having no access at all to the apps felt a bit extreme to me. Keeping my apps on my phone – just more tucked away – also allowed me to practice having self-control, as I still had access and was forced to make the conscious decision to avoid engaging. Knowing the apps were there in the back of my phone was tempting at some points in time, but I knew I needed to hold out and stay true to my commitment to take a break because of all of the positive aspects that were coming with it. And each time I chose to live in the moment versus go on my social media apps, I felt accomplished.

Let’s now talk about what I noticed by doing this cleanse. And afterwards I’ll provide some tips for those who are interested in trying this as well. Remember, this is not an exhaustive list – there are so many benefits to decreasing screen time/time on social media, and they show differently for everyone.

  • One of the first things that I noticed was an overall increase in wellbeing. By this I mean that I simply just felt better – overall! There could be many reasons as to why this was the case, but I think the things that I am about to mention next were a big part of it.
  • One of these things was that I noticed I felt (and probably was) a lot more in the moment. I really felt present! I felt engaged in life and in interactions with others and myself. I’d go as far as to say that going off of my social media actually increased the mindfulness that I had moving through my days. And we know that there are so many different benefits to mindfulness! The biggest benefit that I see in mindfulness is that you are literally taking back time that is otherwise lost to being the opposite of mindful about life. When you are mindful, you are fully living in every moment and taking it all in completely.
  • Another interesting thing that I noticed was that I started choosing to partake in activities that I might not have otherwise gravitated towards as much before taking a break from social media. I actually felt myself getting more creative in my pursuit of entertainment/stimulation. For instance, I started playing more board games and card games with my family. And I started using the app Duolingo to re-teach myself Spanish. It wasn’t that I wasn’t interested in doing these types of activities before, but it was just so easy to hop on my phone (social media) that I often times wouldn’t even consider trying something else. In this way, I believe that the cleanse actually helped me to expand my mind in a way and increase my creativity as it relates to choosing new and fun activities to engage in. Now, even though I am not on a hiatus from social media anymore, I still choose to participate in these activities that I picked up during my break, and I’m so happy that I have this newfound appreciation for them.
  • Another interesting thing that I noticed had to do with the amount of time I felt I had in a day. Time is something that many of us seem to have a bit of a love/hate relationship with. Many of us feel that in this fast-paced day and age we live in we never have enough time to truly live! I think that often times we genuinely believe we have zero free time in any given day – and for some of us with super busy schedules this might be true at times – but think about the number that is your screen time (this number can usually be found in the settings app of a smartphone) and how much time this takes out of a 24-hour day. Say your screen time each day is 4 hours (out of 24). That is 1/6th of your day lost to staring at a screen versus participating in life outside of the screen. Imagine if you even just cut that number in half and had an extra hour or two to do what you wanted with each day – that’d be so much more time to actually live!

Are you looking to do a cleanse yourself but simply don’t know where to get started? Here are some tips that I found to be helpful in staying true to the commitment to a cleanse:

  • One thing that I found helpful – this I mentioned earlier too – was to put the social media apps in a folder on the last ‘page’ of my phone so that they weren’t as easily accessible; they were ‘out of sight out of mind’ so to speak.
  • Turning off notifications and badges was also so helpful! I cannot emphasize this enough. This made all the difference for me. In the past, it was so easy to feel tempted to go on social media anytime and all the time because there were constantly notifications reminding me that something new was happening. Those little red badges would constantly tell me that I had a new message on Instagram or picture to see on Snapchat. By turning off my notifications and badges I was able to cut down on my usage a lot as I didn’t see everything constantly popping up on my lock screen and, subsequently, wasn’t always automatically checking it – it became a conscious decision to go on an app, and I got to see any updates when I made this decision. I realized that a lot of these updates were not nearly as ‘time sensitive’ as I had labeled them as before and that a lot of them could wait until the end of the day.
  • A caveat here: I think that often times our social media usage can become quite “autopiloted” versus conscious, and so one easy way to cut down on social media usage is to simply become more aware of our usage – this means both being aware of when you are and aren’t going on as well as being aware of whether or not you’re doing so consciously. For some, keeping a journal might even be of value! You could simply log whenever you are going on, for how long, why you decided to go on, and what you were doing in order to become more mindful of your usage (if anything).
  • If you feel comfortable doing so, making an announcement online to others that you will be cutting off/down your usage can be really helpful – this serves as an accountability check. This could be as simple as making an Instagram story (or any other equivalent) that says something along the lines of, “Taking a break from social media for a few days [or weeks if you choose] – if you need to contact me, shoot me a text instead.” Putting out a message like this can also save you from the stressful thought that perhaps others will think you’re ignoring them, or the stress that you might miss an important message from a loved one. (You can also just reach out to the individuals who would be most likely to contact you and just let them know to reach out via a phone call or text message instead.)
  • Making an announcement to friends and family that you tend to see on a regular basis can also be quite helpful (& is something you could do instead of making one online if you don’t feel as comfortable doing that) – these people can help check you if they see you spending a lot of time on your phone!

Well, that is all I have for now. I hope that at least one of these tips and tricks rings true with you! If now is a time that you would like to do a cleanse as well – just remember, we all have different needs… do what’s right for you and adjust when needed! Balance in life is important.

xoxo,

Lauren at HPW

 

 

 

How to Support a Loved One Going Through a Tough Time During COVID-19

kwagne26 Health and Well-being ,

How to Support a Loved One Going Through a Tough Time During COVID-19

Article Posted on Mental Health First Aid By Rubina Kapil on March 20, 2020

 

If you or someone you care about feels overwhelmed with emotions like sadness, depression or anxiety, or like you want to harm yourself or others call 911.

You can also contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) Disaster Distress Helpline at 800-985-5990, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or text MHFA to 741741 to talk to a Crisis Text Line counselor.

 

Isolation from friends and family, job loss and death are challenges we’re all facing during these days of COVID-19. You are not alone. COVID-19 is affecting families across the world. We encourage you to stay connected with your loved ones while practicing physical distancing. It’s important that you support one other during this difficult time, especially if your loved one may be facing a mental health concern.

Use tips from the MHFA curriculum to reach out to someone who might need you.

  1. Treat the person with respect and dignity. Listen nonjudgmentally, and respect the person’s privacy and confidentiality.
  2. Offer consistent emotional support and understanding. In difficult times, we all need additional love and understanding. Remember to be empathetic, compassionate and patient.
  3. Have realistic expectations. Accept the person as they are. Tough times can make it harder than usual to do everyday activities like cleaning the house, paying bills or feeding the dog. Be gentle with your loved ones.
  4. Give the person hope. Remind your loved one that with time and treatment, they will feel better and there is hope for a more positive future.
  5. Provide practical help. Offer help with overwhelming tasks, but be careful not to take over or encourage dependency. For example, offer to bring groceries over.
  6. Offer information. Provide information and resources for additional support, including self-help strategies and professional help.

Several tips for what not to do are:

  1. Avoid telling someone to “snap out of it” or to “get over it.”
  2. Avoid adopting an overinvolved or overprotective attitude toward someone who is depressed.
  3. Avoid using a patronizing tone of voice or a facial expression that shows an extreme look of concern.
  4. Avoid ignoring, disagreeing with or dismissing the person’s feelings by attempting to say something positive like, “You don’t seem that bad to me.”

Many health professionals believe self-help strategies can be helpful when you’re feeling depressed or anxious. It is a good idea to discuss the appropriateness of specific strategies with a mental health professional. Some strategies include:

  1. Self-help books based on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).Researchers have sought to develop a CBT-based guided self-help intervention that may prove useful for adults with intellectual disability in addition to depression or other mental health challenges for which CBT has been shown to be helpful.
  2. Computerized therapy.Self-help treatment programs delivered over the internet or on a computer; some are available free of charge.
  3. Relaxation training.Teaching a person to relax voluntarily by tensing and relaxing muscle groups; some programs are available for free online.
  4. Complementary therapies. Scientific studies of complementary therapies such as acupuncture, meditation, mindfulness, yoga, exercise and dietary supplements have shown that these therapies do make a difference for depression.

If you’re still not sure what to do, reach out to your primary care physician. This person can help you with determining the best next steps for mental health support strategies, resources or treatments. Thank you for choosing to #BeTheDifference for yourself and your loved ones during this difficult time.

 

 

 

Wellness Wednesday – Mental Health

Wellness Wednesdays , , , ,

Mental Health. Why is it important? Why are you hearing so much about mental health these days? It’s relevant right now because this month, May, is Mental Health Awareness Month. So let’s talk about it!

What is mental health? Mental health refers to our cognitive, behavioral, and emotional well-being. It is all about how people think, feel, and behave. People sometimes use the term “mental health” to mean the absence of a mental disorder. Mental health can affect daily living, relationships, and physical health. Mental wellbeing describes your mental state – how you are feeling and how well you can cope with day-to-day life. Our mental wellbeing is dynamic. If you have good mental wellbeing you are able to feel relatively confident in yourself and have positive self-esteem. Additionally, you can feel and express a range of emotions.

It’s also our ability to handle the many things that come our way. Our mental health is something that is not commonly talked about, and therefore seems to have a lot of grey area around the subject. This makes it even more important to be talked about. The stigma surrounding mental health has built a wall around the topic. Conversations on mental health would end before they even began. The code of silence was (and still sometimes is) real. Let’s work here to break down that wall. 

It’s important we start the conversation because maybe someone might never know that their mental health is connected to their physical health. That’s right; the correlation between an upset stomach and racing thoughts is valid! For many, it’s a relief to know that what they’re feeling is normal. For most, the only way to come to this realization is by talking about it and listening to others talk about it. 

Stressors in our lives will have a substantial impact on our mental health. As college students, we’re well accustomed to stress. I, for one, excel in the fine art of procrastination. I call it an art because the amount of finesse it takes to turn-in an assignment thirty seconds before the submission deadline is one that is is gained only through rigorous practice. I can confidently say this negatively affects my mental health. In our presentation, we talked about the stress curve. I’m sure I won’t be the first to admit that I often find myself in the “zone of delusion”. I may think that I’m doing my best work when in reality I’m not. This kind of stress may only be short-term, but that still is impacting my mental health, as mentioned.

We know that both short-term and long term stress will impact our mental health. If you’re familiar with Hope For The Day (a non-profit supporting proactive mental health awareness and suicide prevention), you might know a little about their soda bottle example. If none of this rings a bell for you, allow me to explain. Think of your mind like a bottle of soda. Stressors of the day, or the month, or the year, etc. all build pressure in our “soda bottle” mind. Without any relief, the pressure would build and we would explode. Think of that stage as a crisis stage requiring immediate intervention. We all have different thresholds. To alleviate some of this pressure we need to make use of “valves” – things that help us decompress and as the word suggests, valve! Personally, I find that making art or working out has become valuable ways to let off pressure in my soda bottle mind but it’s important to understand the actual act of self-care versus coping. They are close, though not identical. Coping strategies help us in the short-term. Long-term success is made easier when we develop healthy self-care strategies. Self-care and coping strategies work together to further improve our mental health and wellbeing. 

Self-care can do wonders in the short term but not every human struggle can be relieved with a simple act of self-care. Medically diagnosable disorders are more complex than just the average stressful day at the office. Biology plays a major role in mental health. A simple prescription can help balance the body’s natural chemicals when something may be off. There’s a common idea that taking medicine is weak. I’m here to tell you that’s the furthest thing from the truth. You’re not weak for taking an aspirin when you have a headache and you’re not weak for taking an anti-depressant when there’s a chemical imbalance in the brain. If we saw someone walking around with a broken ankle we wouldn’t tell them to shake it off; we’d get them professional medical care. We should be doing the same for mental health. I’m going to borrow a well-known phrase here, (another HFTD plug, sorry.) “It’s ok not to be ok.”

As always, all of us at Health Promotion & Wellness are here to support you and if you ever need anything, please, reach out. Our contact information is found on our website where you can set up an appointment or just give us a call and say “hey!”. Outside of DePaul Resources, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at 1-800-273-8255, but if you or someone you know is experiencing an emergency and in need of immediate help, dial 911. 

By breaking the silence we tear down the stigma surrounding mental health. Be proactive. Be productive. Start the conversation. 

You can view the corresponding Wellness Wednesday workshop video here!

Body Image and Quarantine – Fighting Against the Productivity Myth

cnewby Health and Well-being, PHE Blogs

Body Image and Quarantine: Navigating the Productivity Myth

Content creators across their various platforms have jumped at the chance to publish cutting edge material designed to set them apart during the Covid-19 pandemic, and fitness influencers are no different. It feels nearly impossible to log onto any one of your various social media platforms without seeing a new post about some sort of “quarantine diet”, at-home workouts, or posts with an underlying tone of shame for not embracing all of this new “free time”. A consistent theme throughout Covid-19 messaging is the theory that everyone should be taking advantage of the stay-at-home orders by learning new skills, starting new businesses, and taking steps to “improve” one’s body by taking up new workout routines or dieting habits.

https://asunow.asu.edu/20200402-creativity-how-thrive-self-quarantine

These messages are multi-faceted: with the closure of gyms and studios, there are people who are genuinely looking for fitness alternatives. However, the insistence that everyone needs to be using this time to “better” themselves is not fair and is ignorant of the circumstances that most of our fellow community members are facing. With the constant and ever-present expression that now is a time for productivity and achievements, people may begin to question their successes and efforts made during their time in quarantine. This can be especially true when it comes to issues of body image and the messaging we are exposed to regarding our bodies and how to treat them and how they should look during this time.

https://twitter.com/amygorin/status/1241031001884819461

In short, you are not “lazy” for not being able to or not wanting to use your free time at home to exercise. For many people, the idea of having “more free time” is not the case at all due to increased need for childcare, the continuing job expectations for essential workers, and the innumerable other responsibilities and stressors placed upon people during this time. The idea of “hustle” mindset comes from the ingrained capitalist frame that we can “increase” our worth through productivity and subsequently are led to believe that if we do not use this time at home in a productive manner, we are failing in some way.

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1785218-wholesome-memes

This mindset can be particularly damaging when it is targeted at fitness and body image during quarantine. For people whose regular routines were entirely changed by the pandemic, exercise routines and gym plans where most likely pushed to the wayside. When met with content insisting that one must push themselves regardless, it can turn into damaging rhetoric reflecting on a person’s self-worth and their feelings towards their body.

Throughout this unprecedented time, it is more essential now than ever to be kind to yourself and your body. Do what feels right for you – a home workout may be just what you need! But if you feel yourself being negatively affected by the content you are taking in related to what you should be doing with your body, you do not have to feel bad about unfollowing fitness or “wellness” accounts whose impact have the opposite effect. Feel free to contact the Office of Health Promotion and Wellness, and follow our social media for more information as to how to stay mentally well during a pandemic.

https://www.shutterstock.com/image-vector/just-stay-home-young-smiling-girl-1677775699

For more resources about pressured productivity, check out these websites for more information:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/apr/24/productivity-in-coronavirus-lockdown

 

https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/reviewedcom/2020/04/21/10-productive-things-you-dont-need-do-during-coronavirus-pandemic/2999814001/

How to Care for Yourself While Practicing Physical Distancing

kwagne26 Health and Well-being ,

How to Care for Yourself While Practicing Physical Distancing

Article Posted on Mental Health First Aid By Rubina Kapil on March 20, 2020

 

If you or someone you care about feels overwhelmed with emotions like sadness, depression or anxiety, or like you want to harm yourself or others call 911.

You can also contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s (SAMHSA) Disaster Distress Helpline at 800-985-5990, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or text Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) to 741741 to talk to a Crisis Text Line counselor.

 

This is a stressful time for many. With the government and media sharing updates throughout the day and the fear of the unknown, it is understandable to feel overwhelmed, stressed and anxious. You are not alone. Millions of people across the country are facing the same worries and challenges that you are. During this time, it is important to remember that it’s OK to not be OK. It’s also important to take care of your mental health. While practicing physical distancing, there are easy self-care strategies that can help reduce feelings of depression and anxiety, or prevent anxiety before it even starts.

Use these tips from the MHFA curriculum to take care of your mental health while practicing physical distancing.

  1. Eat healthfully — Choose foods that help you feel energized and reduce your consumption of alcohol and other foods that make you feel tired or unwell.
  2. Exercise — Reduces symptoms of depression and anxiety, whether we’re working out at home or taking a solo jog around the neighborhood; add in movement to your daily activites.
  3. Practice relaxation therapy — Focusing on tensing and relaxing muscle groups can help you relax voluntarily when feeling overwhelmed, stressed or anxious. Practicing deep breathing techniques as well as mindfulness meditation can help  you feel grounded and more present each day.
  4. Let light in — For some people, increased exposure to light can improve symptoms of depression. If you can, open the shades and let more sunlight in or get outside, this can dramatically improve your mood!
  5. Be kind to yourself — Treat yourself with the same compassion you would a friend. Our best every day may look a bit different and it is alway shelpful to take frequent breaks from work/school throughout the day. Be sure to fill your cup up frequently!
  6. Stay connected — Even if you can’t get together face-to-face, you can stay connected to friends, family and neighbors with phone calls, text messages, video chats and social media. If you’re feeling lonely, sad or anxious, reach out to your social support networks. Share what you are feeling and offer to listen to friends or family members about their feelings. We are all experiencing this scary and uncertain time together.
  7. Monitor media consumption — While you might want to stay up-to the minute with COVID-19 news, too much exposure can be overwhelming. Balance media consumption with other activities you enjoy, such as reading, cooking or listening to music.

Self-care doesn’t require you to go outside or spend a lot of money. Adding small changes to your routine can make a big difference to your overall mood and well-being.

Thank you for choosing to #BeTheDifference and remember to practice self-care.

 

Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) Round Table

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To honor Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM) in April, HPW had a live roundtable around supporting survivors of abusive relationships, whether it’s sexual abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse, or financial abuse. This blog covers all of the important details of that conversation. Sadly, a lot of survivors right now may not be able to escape their abusive situations. Many people currently can’t leave their houses or go to a friend’s place to escape due to the current pandemic we are living through. Financial situations are also exacerbated right now and may make it even tougher for some to leave an abusive relationship. In our roundtable the other week, we talked about how to be an ally to those in this tricky situation. Watch here, or read on!

What exactly does abuse look like?

Stereotypically, when we think of an abusive relationship, we think of physical abuse. But abuse can be of a physical nature, and emotional one, a sexual one, or a financial one. Abuse does not need to be put into a box, and it’s important to keep this in mind when supporting survivors. Really, at the end of the day, abuse occurs when the power and control in a relationship is shifted to be completely one sided.

 

So, in what ways might we go about supporting someone who is experiencing abuse?

Remaining available to someone in an abusive relationship is one of the most helpful things you can do. There are three great ways to do this: 1) Ask a question, 2) Listen up, and 3) Stay connected. Let’s look at each of these closer.

Ask a question: Asking a question as simple as “Hey, how is it going?” and then really listening to what the person has to say can make worlds of a difference.

Listen up: When you listen, you must listen without having your own agenda. You are listening to hear what this person’s perspective on their situation is. Active listening techniques can be used here to support your loved one. Examples of some things you may say after listening are:

  • “I don’t even know what to say right now, but I’m so glad you told me.”
  • “I’m so sorry that this is happening to you, and I am here to support you.”
  • “I believe you” – saying this and truly meaning it is crucial in supporting a survivor – it is not our place to play detective in these situations; most survivors tell the truth about their abuse, and it can be quite harmful to not believe somebody who has put their trust in you in this situation.

Stay connected: Staying connected can be crucial in supporting a survivor because when a survivor is isolated from outside support, the abuser tends to have more power over them. Your loved one may not be reaching out simply because they can’t, not because they don’t want or need support. Every once in a while, try being the first one to reach out – this can act as a lifeline to your loved one. Avoid ultimatums; although it might be easy to say something along the lines of, “If you don’t leave this person by [said time] I cannot continue to be friends with you,” this is simply not what your loved one needs to hear right now. Abuse does not follow any specific timeline, and there are many reasons why someone may not be able to leave an abusive relationship right away, not to mention it could be quite dangerous to leave an abusive relationship at certain times (more on this below). Tough love is not what people need in these circumstances.

Supporting a Survivor Dos and Don’ts

Don’t: Tell someone to leave – the leaving part of an abusive relationship is the most dangerous phase of the relationship: the point when someone leaves and six weeks after this is the time that this person is most likely to be killed.

Do: Work with your loved one to create a safety plan with tangible steps for this person to use when the time comes that they are able to leave.

Don’t: When it comes to sexual abuse, do not ask your loved one victim-blaming questions. Your initial response in certain cases might be to ask questions such as, “How did this happen – didn’t you cover your drink? What were you wearing when this happened?” But these questions simply contribute to a culture of victim blaming that takes the blame off of the perpetrator and puts it onto the survivor instead.

Do: Reinforce that you believe and support your loved one.

Don’t: Make it about you and your own personal desires as they relate to the situation. Supporting someone who is experiencing abuse consists of allowing the survivor to still have their autonomy. They are otherwise already losing autonomy in their relationship, so when we come in and tell them what to do – i.e. “You should file a police report” – it takes the autonomy away from the survivor. Let them make these decisions on their own time, and support them while they move through it.

Do: Seek help for yourself if you need it personally, but leave your opinions out of your loved one’s decisions.

 

What should you do if you think that your loved one is in a situation that could potentially be very dangerous?

If you hear that something that makes you concerned your loved one is in immediate danger (they are isolated, being monitored or stalked, or the person has a weapon), you – or both of you together – can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline to come up with a plan to stay as safe as possible.

Note: It is very important to understand that some societal structures and resources may be safe for certain populations to use, but not for others. (i.e., a person of color may not be comfortable making a call to the police as police are notorious for not supporting the black community equally in comparison to their white counterparts). Don’t assume that calling the police is a given in these situations – it is best to understand the ways in which your loved one might be affected by these societal structures first, and then make a sound decision on next steps.

 

How to Talk to Someone Who is Causing Harm

Abuse, coercion, and control are incredibly common… people that cause harm might be the same people we love and care about. If we are going to address the harm that is being caused, we must learn how to talk to those causing the harm as well. When talking to someone who is causing harm in a relationship, you can use the same tactics as you might when talking to a survivor – 1) Ask a question, 2) Listen up, and 3) Stay connected. Think about how you would like to be treated if you were causing harm, and approach this person the same way. ‘Call the person in’ versus ‘calling them out.’ People don’t listen when they are called out – by inviting the person causing harm to have an open and constructive conversation about their behavior, you might have a better chance of getting through to them. It is important to recognize that change will only be made if both sides are engaged in the conversation. Currently, our justice system focuses more on punishing than restorative justice, but restorative justice can prove to be largely important in enacting change rather than simply perpetuating the norm.

How can I take care of myself when supporting a survivor?

You are actually considered a ‘secondary survivor’ when you are supporting a survivor as this process can be quite emotionally taxing for you as well. So, make sure to take care of yourself through it all, and try to recognize your limits:

  • Practice grounding techniques – breathing exercises can serve as a great way to ground yourself. Box breathing is one good technique to try – there are many others as well.
  • Don’t get so completely invested that you forget about other pieces of your own life/your health, recovery, and healing. You have a responsibility to yourself as first and foremost – we can’t help others if we aren’t doing well ourselves.
  • Keeping healthy boundaries in all relationships is crucial, especially when it comes to supporting a survivor. What are your boundaries and what can you give? What is your personal threshold? Keep these questions in mind as you are helping your loved one, and never feel guilty for taking a step back to preserve your own mental health.

 

If you’ve made it this far, thanks for sticking with us! We hope that you learned something new and are feeling more prepared to help. Remember, take care of yourself, take care of each other, take care DePaul! <3

xoxo,

HPW

Wellness Wednesday – Healthy Relationships

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Hello everybody! Welcome back to yet another Wellness Wednesday blog post from yours truly, the Office of Health Promotion and Wellness (and our guest speakers at Mission and Ministry!). If you’d like to view the video version of this Wellness Wednesday click here, otherwise read on!

 

 

 

 

 

This Wellness Wednesday we were lucky enough to have Mission and Ministry join us for a conversation around healthy relationships during COVID-19. Keep reading for a look into Vinny and Louise’s relationship and how it relates to the times (Mission and Ministry) as well as some of HPW’s tips for maintaining healthy relationships during quarantine!

A message from Mission and Ministry: “You’ve hopefully learned some stories about Vincent and Louise during your time at DePaul. We don’t always talk about the collaborative relationship they had – this dynamic duo that we celebrate today shaped each other to be the leaders that we remember them to be. Vincent would not be Vincent if it were not for Louise’s leadership, and Louise would not have discovered her true purpose and calling if she had not first been sent forth by Vincent. This dynamic duo has much to teach us about healthy relationships.”

“So, learning from Vincent and Louise, what are some things we can do to ensure we are practicing holistic care and being in right relationships with one another?”

  • “We are not meant to balance everything at the same time! Sometimes we need to take off one of our hats and focus on another one.”
  • Boundary setting is something that Vincent and Louise helped each other to do well: “Before addressing any business, Louise and Vincent would take the time to check in with each other. Their letters show that they were not only professional collaborators, but personable friends as well. They would do check-ins asking each other how they were and how their health was doing. Vincentians recognize that healthy relationships are essential for carrying out a shared vision. We can’t do it alone!”
  • “Authentic collaboration takes work – it takes listening, building relationships, understanding where someone is coming from, putting ourselves in others’ shoes, letting go of our agenda, failing, picking ourselves back up and trying again, apologizing and asking for forgiveness. It means being vulnerable and courageous and speaking your truth with love.”
  • Read on to hear more about boundary setting and healthy relationships from HPW!

When we discuss healthy relationships during COVID-19, it might be helpful to break this into two categories: 1) How to maintain healthy relationships and boundaries while living in close quarters with others at home, and 2) How to stay connected with friends and family who are miles away from home. The first section of HPW’s advice below will cover this first point, and the second half will cover the latter point. Read on, reader!

 

What does a healthy relationship at home look like during COVID-19?

First and foremost, it is important to acknowledge that everyone’s living situation looks different right now. Some of us are staying with family, some are staying with roommates, some are staying with a partner, and some even have kids at home to deal with! Some of us may be staying alone in isolation – away from family and friends. And some may be dealing with a toxic home environment. Understanding that we are all coming from different places is important as it can allow us to have more empathy towards each other’s situations and realize that everyone is struggling in a different way (and can use support in a different way).

 

Second of all, it is important to take care of yourself first! It can be tough to give yourself to others/be in relationships with others when you haven’t had a chance to show yourself some love first. That’s why right now, especially, it is important to show yourself some love and care. What does this look like? Here are some tips: make sure you are getting a good night’s rest (see our previous blog for tips on refreshing your sleep), get outside, take a shower and do some skincare, eat healthy foods – you get the idea. Humans are sort of like plants, we need sunshine, water, and nutrients too! Remembering these three simple tenets makes for a healthy day. If possible, try to do at least one thing per day that is just plain fun, like doing yoga, savoring your morning coffee, playing a board game, or reading a chapter of a good book.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Another important tenet to relationships right now (and always) is boundary setting. Now especially it is important to create your boundaries and stick to them. Living in such close quarters with loved ones can be very enjoyable, but it can also be very tricky. Without any boundaries, we tend to get worn down over time, and don’t always show up as the best versions of ourselves. Remember, boundaries look different for everyone. Perhaps your sister is better at spending constant time socializing with your family, but maybe you need a little more alone time – don’t let anybody make you feel bad for this – we are all different, and as long as we use respect when setting boundaries, it’s no harm no foul! One way of upholding boundaries can simply be creating a physical space to spend time by yourself every once and a while. Find space in your house for your own personal time. If you have a big family and/or no privacy, take morning walks by yourself or with a pet. Take time to collect yourself and spend time with your own thoughts. Sometimes when we constantly spend time around others, we lose track of what it is that is going on in our own minds – it is important to revive this by spending some time alone, no matter how extraverted you are.

If quarantine is proving to be a really tough time for you and you are struggling to maintain a healthy living situation during all of this, seek support. Although they do look different now, resources are still available to you. The Office of Health Promotion and Wellness is still taking virtual appointments via Zoom. Feel free to call us at 773-325-7129 or complete the online intake form on our website (https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/hpw.aspx) to schedule your one on one with one of our professional staff members. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is still up and running as well at 1-800-799-7233. If you are unable to speak on the phone without being overheard, you can also text LOVEIS to 22522. If you would simply like to chat with HPW about more resources at your disposal during this tough time, we are available for that as well via appointment at the contact information mentioned above.

 

What does it look like to maintain healthy relationships while social distancing?

Having a tough time staying connected with loved ones who are farther away or not in your house during COVID-19? You’ve come to the right place. The following are some tips for finding community and connection during this virtual reality we are currently living in.

  • Missing loved ones who live farther away? Set up a recurring zoom call with friends or family. Having a set time each week to talk can provide you with something to look forward to! It doesn’t need to be long if you’re not up for it – even just seeing loved one’s faces briefly can help light up a day or week!
  • If it’s possible in the state that you are living in currently, you can do outdoor activities with others who live nearby, but at a distance, such as going on walks at a 6 feet distance from each other, or putting out lawn chairs to sit and chat outside – just keep your distance here as well.
  • If you miss being able to sit with a loved one and watch a movie or show together, you can use Netflix Party to watch shows at the exact same time while having access to a chat bar as well. You could even Zoom during a show or a movie so that you can have live reactions to it as well! Simply share your screen, mute yourselves when the show/movie is going, and pause to have conversation in between.
  • If you’re someone who misses having in person intellectual conversations with others, you could have a virtual book club with a friend or family member. Simply read the same book at the same time and have periodic Zoom calls with discussion questions to chat about after each chapter or so!
  • If you’re done with so much screen time, but still looking for a meaningful way to stay in touch with loved ones, send notes in the mail. This can be such a nice surprise, especially during these tough times. If you have a printer at home, you could even print out pictures of yourself with the person you’re sending a note to and include those as well!
  • Another kind gesture to a family member or friend who lives nearby could be leaving a baked good, a note, a small art project, or a small gift on a friend’s doorstep for them to find later on.
  • Does one of your loved ones have a birthday during these tough times? If they live nearby you, have a drive by parade for them with signs on each car! If they live farther away, throw a virtual party for them. Reach out to their loved ones and schedule a Zoom call for a specific time – have everyone show up with drinks (of any kind) to ‘cheers’ the person on their special day! You can even incorporate some kind words by having everyone prepare a small speech about that person ahead of time, if you would like.
  • If you are tired of living in our current reality, make some future plans with pals. Obviously, some details will need to be left out for now, as booking travel and hotels is a no go currently, but you can plan generally for where you might want to go and what you might want to do when all of this is over!
  • Simply looking to have some fun and take a break from it all? Kick back with a virtual game night complete with snacks, drinks… the whole 9 yards. Trivia games are easy ones to play via Zoom, but get creative and come up with some other game ideas as well!

Again, it is important to remember that boundaries are still important, even when it comes to online relationships (check out our blog on establishing healthy boundaries for tips on this!).

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for joining us! Hopefully at least one of these tips regarding healthy relationships during COVID-19 has resonated with you. Again, if you are struggling to cope right now and are seeking some support, our office is always here as a resource. Feel free to call us at 773-325-7129 or complete the online intake form on our website (https://offices.depaul.edu/student-affairs/about/departments/Pages/hpw.aspx) to schedule your one on one with one of our professional staff members. Hang in there everybody! We will get through this – together!  

Bringing The Outdoors Indoors

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For those of us who call ourselves “adventurers”, “wanderers” or what have you, it’s easy to feel lost during this time; no pun intended. Understandably so, things just aren’t the same. The socially responsible voice playing in our head or on our Instagram feed (@whereslightfoot, anyone?) is telling us to stay home. Granted, I’ve been guilty of sneaking some much needed time on trails and paths but so has everyone else! I’m not using that to justify my time out, rather, the opposite. If we’re all out on the same trails or at the same parks then it’s easy to see how risky it can be. By all means, go for that walk or that bike ride – but do so responsibly! I can promise you that the day the green flag waves will be unimaginably wonderful. Until then, let’s try something new – something different. I bet you didn’t know that Google Earth offers virtual tours of 31 National Park sites. Maybe you didn’t realize the vast amount of nature films and documentaries on the most popular streaming services. You’d be amazed at all the interesting and fun ways to bring the outdoors indoors! Here are just a few. 

I mentioned Google Earth but I didn’t tell you what a vast resource it actually can be. You’re able to take all sorts of adventures from the comfort of your couch or under the covers of your bed. As your local guide today, my first suggestion would be exploring some of our nation’s most treasured places; the National Parks. The best part? No admission fees! Give yourself an hour and you can mosey around Arches National Park in Utah for a few minutes and then find yourself in Maine, at Arcadia National Park, for the rest of the time. If that doesn’t tickle your fancy then shoot on over to the Florida Everglades – all before lunch. I encourage you to check out the “voyager” tab inside Google Earth for a few more surprises too!

If you’re a nonfiction fanatic like me then I’m sure you can appreciate the long list of outdoor adventure films and documentaries that streaming services like Disney Plus, Netflix, and many more, have listed. I’ll follow with some of my favorites here with a link to their homepage if they have one – but be sure to check if they’re still streaming:

Into The Wild (2007) 

Nature (38 Seasons and still going!) – PBS

National Parks Adventure (2016) – Netflix

The Dawn Wall (2017) – Netflix

Mountain (2017) – Netflix 

Night On Earth (2020) – Netflix Original Series

Jumbo Wild (2015) – Amazon Prime Video

Antarctica: A Year On Ice (2017) – Amazon Prime Video

Something a little different: At The Drive-In (2019) – Amazon Prime Video

If all this screen time lately has you overwhelmed then I’d urge you to find something else to break up the monotony that we’re coming to know. If you’re feeling something more stimulating try things like potting plants! These can be for either indoor or outdoor beauty. It’s hard to argue with the benefits of indoor plants. If you find yourself as one of those people who can’t seem to keep a plant alive for more than a few weeks (like me, oops.) there are always alternatives. Pressing flowers can be a great way to preserve some gems that you’d like to hold on to – just remember to respect wildlife and keep in mind the Leave No Trace Principles if you’re looking outside. REI has a great blog that includes a number of outdoorsy activities that are worth checking out while we’re hunkered down at home. 

We’re having to live life a little differently right now, and frankly, that’s the perfect time to experience something new! As I hope you’ve seen, experiencing something new doesn’t necessarily mean leaving the house. Let’s make the most of this time and find adventure in places where we’d least expect it. Go watch a movie or read a blog. Pot a plant or just admire their beauty from afar. I hope you found some solace in this piece and remember to take good care of yourself. Let’s rekindle our love for the great outdoors and find wanderlust in new responsible ways so we’re ready when the green flag waves.